CAR FACE

Last night Andrew and I had a good party. Before that Jói and I went to the opening of this Michel Gondry show at Deitch Projects. On display were the sets from his upcoming movie which I am now even more excited to see because now I've been in it. It's about people who have a video store but all their TAPES go blank so they have to act out and record all the movies themselves. here's michel gondry pretending that the trailer went blank and acting it out himself.



later lots of other people came over and we played games. game night works like this: jews give points to jews, icelandic people give points to icelandic people, gays give points to their boyfriends, and despite giving each other points icelandic people loose anyway because they're foreign. everyone has fun anyway because they're drunk.

we also watched this,



Possibly my all time favorite kids' film; All dogs go to heaven (1989) is the reason why I grew up to like a) good films b) really fucked up films. All dogs go to heaven is a really fucked up kids' film about gangsters, violence, murder, intoxication, gambling, heaven, hell, poor people, and other fucked up things. But everyone is a dog. There is a Burt Reynolds dog and a jewish dog and a dog named car face. but there is also a giant homosexual singing alligator who eats people and there is a little orphan girl. Jói kept saying that the little girl had sexy legs. the little girl is supposed to be like 6 years old.

the actress who voiced the part of the little girl was 10 years old when the movie was made. she was also 10 years old when she was shot and killed by her fucked up father. this was her final film and that makes the film even more sad and fucked up.

I don't know why I'm awake at 9 the morning after I get drunk and stay up late. I think I was too thirsty to sleep. Now I'm going to wait for the other people in the world to wake up.

it is my tradition to write very long stories on february 15th

Today is Valentines day. Actually, it stopped 2 hours ago.

this day had the reoccurring event of people being awkward/weird/rude with me because I'm foreign. this usually doesn't happen that often. today it happened 3 times. it made me really upset so i couldn't go do this thing I was excited to go do (read funny love letter written to me by crazy teenage drug addict that i barely knew. I was going to read it in a room full of bitter feminists).

instead Rachael and I made vegetable-themed miniature valentines day cards for mama's food shop (small enough so you can roll them up inside a dollar bill without it being noticeable), got a huge pile of banana cream pie, snuck the card into their tip jar and drank beer while reading aloud to each other from a funny book.

there is actually just one person I would make out with at mama's food shop and he wasn't even there that night. he was somewhere else, living the mystery that is his life outside of his job, wearing black, smoking cigarettes, walking like he was born on a horse.

---

here is what happened since I wrote that last part:
(Andrew's boyfriend is having a valentines day party. I told them I wasn't coming because I was going to sleep)
Andrew called and said: there is such an attractive straight boy here. come over right now.
I got there in literally one second.
I did not find the boy attractive at all,
still, I would describe him as pretty.
He did not look like a cat.
He looked more like a koala bear.





A year ago I wrote a big angry essay on valentines day. I sort of still feel the same so I will show you some excerpts.

"I had a boyfriend once (can you imagine, that must have been like in the stone age)."

"I used to hate [...] flowers and advised everyone to rather try to impress the objects of their desire with potted plants, or cake."

"The mice under my bed sound like they are the size of cats."

---

Rachael and I did not get any valentine's day cards, or poems. So we decided to go through Rachael's cell phone and look for text messages that could pass as poems. Here's what we got:

Lonely pilot on valentines day

i took the hovercraft for a spin at the park
i was the only person there with a hovercraft
everyone had like a dog
or some shit animal.

-joni


nina simone

nina simone
also shot her neighbor's son
because he was laughing
when she was concentrating
on piano.

-singer

where should I go during my trip to Israel?

choose googoo for gaza!
you will go to the gaza strip
with an american flag covered tour bus.

-joni

kisa/dying

This is me seeing how it will look if I post pictures on this blog.



This is my favorite picture that I drew last semester. It portrays a cat who is happy because it is his birthday, while simultaneously remembering that he is constantly getting older and one day he will die. I drew this in a class called intro to design and visuality or cultural studies or something serious like that, the class was mostly really boring but sometimes awesome (like when I said "porn" in front of a few hundred people, this ended up being the only word I ever said in front of my whole class). I had this class with Eric. Now I have no classes with Eric. Eric is a really gay jewish person with a filthy mouth and I used to live on his bright orange couch. I drew this picture for Eric. I miss him.